Big decisions can cause significant problems inside of family units. That’s why it’s important to try and think your way through some of the major events that might happen, and have a little bit of an advance plan before family members start getting reactive.
A few situations where tough decisions can either cause stress or be amicable include when parents are getting divorced, when couples are separating, if a family is moving, or when there are major purchases to be made, even things like expensive furniture or top-end electronics for example.
Divorce cases can go a few different ways between adults. There can be a lot of stress and anxiety and negative results, or there can be an amicable split where each party gets what they think they deserve. It may be difficult to create a situation that seems fair without help. That’s why it’s so important to hire a divorce lawyer, even when parents think that they can handle all of the legal details by themselves. There are almost always things that people are going to disagree on, and having that lawyer there in the middle to smooth the situation over has definite benefits.
One step down from getting a divorce, there is the matter of separation. Some resources suggest a checklist before separation for adults, and knowing that that sort of option is there for you to look over before someone heads out to purchase a motel room, more rational decisions can be made earlier in the process. Separation is never easy, but sometimes the time away is the best thing for a family. So it’s all about making sure the options are understood.
If a parent gets a new job, sometimes the family has to move. And though it may be a unilateral change in the employment structure, it’s going to be a change for everyone in the household, especially about things like schools for younger children. So talk to your kids about moving as the decision is being made, and don’t just include them after all the details have been handled. The more the kids feel involved, the more understanding they will be during the actual moving process.
Making Major Purchases
Major purchases can be a point of contention within families as well. If you’re thinking about buying a new car, or new furniture, or new expensive electronic systems that deal with your entertainment center, be sure to talk to everyone who uses those things. You may not be entirely aware of what kind of emotional connection people have between themselves and an old piece of furniture. Talking in advance about these types of decisions will prevent a lot of arguments further down the road.
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