Debates on whether women can have it all have raged on for years. The undercurrent is that only women who marry rich or are running their own companies can have it all. This idea is quite discouraging for the average women with a family and a job. That doesn’t mean that, despite your circumstances, that you shouldn’t try living your best life. It could be being an expert is answering what is family law, having a good marriage or raising healthy well-rounded children; you can still be the best career-wise and at home.
The journey to that place starts sooner than you think and also requires a support system to help attain your dreams. Here’s how you can go about aiming to have it all.
Find a partner that values what you value
No one starts a marriage wanting a divorce. It will however likely be a contributing factor if you marry someone that doesn’t support your vision. Ask questions and watch and listen carefully to a potential partner’s views on the role of women in their life. If they think women should be running homes and raising kids that should be a red flag for you, who want to hold down a job or start a business.
In the early stages, they should display a keen interest in your career growth be it moves your making at work or the idea of going back to school. However, as with all things, there has to be a compromise. Inevitably, if you choose to have children, you might need to take some time off. Ask what their plan is when you do have children. Does he think you should quit your job, or is he willing to draft a schedule to raise the kids actively? These and other difficult questions and conversations ought to take place if you wish to attain even a sense of having it all.
Mind your social circles
You want to be around women who have shown the ability to keep a job, raise their kids and still find time for their husband. They don’t have to be rich or running their own companies, however, ought to show dedication. That does not mean transforming into Wonder woman; it means asking for help when they need it, acknowledging that they do drop balls from time to time, but are still willing to push through and be the best version of themselves, daily.
In the same way, you need to find people that live a similar life. Proximity and matching schedules make it easier for you to rely on each other. Having people around you in the same space makes it easier to have someone to lean on and bounce ideas off. They can understand you and point out your blind spots. Having accountability partners also ensure that, on the arduous journey to having it all, you have someone pushing and cheerleading each of your steps.
